Just call me a slacker....

Ok Ok OK. I had the best intentions with the 30 day challenge. I have failed miserably. I WILL do it. I just need to get through the next week or so. Things are SOOOO busy at my house right now. We have 3 birthdays and one anniversary all within 7 days of each other...ok one of those birthdays isn't IN my house but still someone very close to us. Add that to my son's baseball schedule and my sisters {who is 12 years younger than me} marching band schedule, along with church activities and I promise you that at the end of the day there just isn't very much time left for things that I want to do. So...I really want to 'blog' to my daughter who turned 3 yesterday and to my husband in honor of our anniversary. Once I get those accomplished I really do plan to do my 30 day challenge. Until then...just call me a slacker. :-)

My new 30 day Challenge!

Ok...so maybe I'm a little late. Nonetheless I'm going to try it. I saw a post by a fellow blogger about this so I'm GOING TO DO IT! I challenge any of you who are reading this and have your own blog to do it as well. How about leaving me a comment here and letting me know that your going to give it whirl so that I can be sure to follow it. For the next 30 days [gulp] I will TRY to keep up with this challenge!

So here is the challenge for the next 30 days:
Day 1 — A favorite song
Day 2 — A favorite movie
Day 3 — A favorite book
Day 4 — A favorite television program
Day 5 — A favorite quote
Day 6 — A moment you wish you could relive
Day 7 — 5 things you could not possibly live without
Day 8 — A thank you letter to someone who's changed your life
Day 9 — A photo you took
Day 10 — A photo of you taken over ten years ago
Day 11 — A photo of you taken recently
Day 12 — A song that you want played at your wedding (or was played)
Day 13 — A guilty pleasure
Day 14 — A vacation you would like to take
Day 15 — A person you admire
Day 16 — A song that makes you cry
Day 17 — An art piece
Day 18 — A time when you felt passionate and alive
Day 19 — A talent of yours
Day 20 — A hobby of yours
Day 21 — Something you know you do differently than most people
Day 22 — A website
Day 23 — A way in which you want to be remembered
Day 24 — A movie no one would expect you to love
Day 25 — A recipe
Day 26 — A childhood memory
Day 27 — A physical feature you love
Day 28 — A scar you have, and its story or if no scars- a tattoo & story
Day 29 — Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30 — A motto or philosophy


There you have it! Do you have what it takes to take on this challenge? Yeah me either, but I'm going to at least try! Maybe it will get me out of my blogging rut!

As a mother looking back...

Today marks 9 years since that dreadful day. I was 17. Just a teenager. I remember all too well how I felt when I found what was going on. I was scared, angry, confused, shocked, sad...the wide range of emotions I felt was overwhelming. I was driving from my highschool that morning to my second period teacher cadet class at a nearby elementary school. I heard the news on the radio. To be honest I thought it was something from the past. No way would anyone dare to attack the US. No way was this going on right now. I soon realized that it was indeed happening right at that moment. The rest of the day was spent clinging to friends and watching the TV coverage in awe.

As I look back on that day now as a mother I feel even more emotion. There were babies in that building. There were mothers in that building. There were children who went to bed that night without parents and parents who went to bed without their children. As a mother looking back it hurts me to the core to imagine that. There were parents who escaped the initial attack but who felt a duty to help in the rescue efforts and gave their life that day. Their kids went to bed that night without a mommy or daddy and I'm sure in that moment it didn't matter that the rest of the country was calling their mom or dad a hero. As a mother looking back I can't imagine being one of those mothers who dropped my precious baby off at daycare and walked across the street to my job only to look out of the window an hour later to the horror of the building collapsing with my child still inside. As a mother looking back I can't imagine being a mother that day.

May we never forget. May we never forget that for a time we were all united. May we never forget that for a time there was no Jew, Muslim, Christian, black, white, mexican. May we never forget that for a time everyone pulled together. May we always remember that for a time we all supported each other and hurt for each other.

Never Forget, Always Remember

Your First Birthday Is Near

Dear Zayne
My precious baby boy, you are turning one. You will be ONE. My last baby, you are going to be ONE. After what has been a very short year we are planning your first birthday.

Just two short weeks before you were born

It feels like just a few short weeks ago that I went to the doctor for what I thought was just a little back pain and was instead told to go straight to the hospital because at 25 weeks pregnant I was in preterm labor. After a weekend stay at the hospital and drugs to stop labor for me and steriods for you I was released only to come home to 14 weeks of bedrest...which I wasn't very good with by the way.

Then we met you. Our smallest little addition. You made us a party of five. I nice big round number. FIVE. You were perfect. You ARE perfect. My dear boy the last year has gone by way to fast. You are growing way to quickly. You are walking more and more everyday. Your little personality is really starting shine. Your smile brightens up the darkest of rooms. I am not the only person who says "That little boy can't help but smile". You are so happy, so healthy, so precious. You are mine. You have brought so much joy to our home the last year. I miss my tiny newborn but I love seeing you grow and learn. I've recently gone through all your clothes, newborn to 9 months and I have to admit, it made me cry some. I look back and remember how quickly you have grown. Our family didn't skip a beat when we brought you home. Your brother and sister accepted you from day one. Mommy and Daddy have some how figured out how to make this little family run. I am so proud to be your mommy. Even though I'm sad about how fast the last year has gone I am so excited to watch you become a toddler. I'm excited to teach you new things and excited to watch you play with your brother and sister. I'm excited to see you and your daddy play in the floor and I'm looking forward to the first time you say I love you mommy and wrap your little arms around my neck. There are so many things you will learn my precious baby boy. I pray that your heartaches are few and far between and I want you to know that now as a toddler and years from now as an adult that I will always be here for you. My prayer for you is that you will become a man who trusts God with everything and that you will not only have a burden for the lost, but my Dear Son, I pray that you will have the courage to reach out to them. Zayne I love you so much. It is amazing to me how I can love each of you with everything I have and all the same. I pray that you will feel our love everyday, no, every moment of your life. I pray that one day you will look back on your childhood and KNOW that you were loved. My precious little baby, in a few short weeks we will light one single candle and celebrate your first birthday. Today I am thinking of where I was one short year ago before you were born. I am reminded of how scared I was that I wouldn't be able to juggle life with 3 kids. But you have been easy and happy and haven't fussed very much at all along the way. Many days we got tangled up in the daily chaos of our family but dear boy I want you to know that I didn't miss anything. I noticed and praised all of your achievements and I've tried to keep note of when you reached new milestones. I caught them all and always will. You cry seldom, you smile often and you laugh more. You have completed our family and our lives are full.

Zayne I love you beyond words and completely. I always have and I forever will.

Love Mommy

A Few Hours Old

First time meeting your big brother and sister

ONE MONTH OUR TINY BABY

TWO MONTHS AND STILL SO TINY

THREE MONTHS STARTING TO ROLL OVER AND HANGING ON TO YOUR BLUE EYES

FOUR MONTHS LOVING YOUR BUMBO

FIVE MONTHS PLAYING WITH YOUR BROTHER AND SISTER

SIX MONTHS AND SITTING UP LIKE A CHAMP

SEVEN MONTHS AND ALWAYS HAPPY

EIGHT MONTHS AND ON YOUR WAY TO WALKING

NINE MONTHS SUCH A CUTIE


TEN MONTHS HANGING OUT WITH JORDAN AND ALANA


ELEVEN MONTHS AND SOOOO HAPPY!!!!!

TWELVE MONTH PICTURE COMING SOON!!!

Tell Me I'm Not ALONE!!!!!

I feel crazy. I feel like I have no idea what I want. I feel like I have no idea what I feel like. See. I told you I'm crazy. We have 3 precious children and I couldn't ask for anything more than we have. When we had Zayne we threw around the idea of having a fourth child and at one point decided that it was fine with us if thats what God has planned for us. So we were at a point of 'if it happens it happens' kinda thing. Then we talked about it more and decided that we both felt complete. And that is where we have been for the last 5 months or so. Zayne has been our easiest child. There was never any reason for us to slam down our fists and say "THATS IT! WE'RE DONE! WE CAN'T HANDLE ANOTHER CHILD". To be honest our 3 kids are probably easier than some singleton children with Zayne being the easiest. My pregnancy with him was REALLY hard and I have no desire to go through that again BUT there is no guarantee that would happen. The reason we decided to be 'done' is mainly because we {or rather I} are ready to be able to move out of the baby stage. We are ready to be able to do more things without having a baby in tow. Tell me that makes sense to some of you. I'm ready to be able to go places without a diaper bag and go to the beach without a baby, go to Disney world and let ALL my kids enjoy the rides, go camping, go places without wondering whether or not I'm going to be able to put my child down, go somewhere that I don't have to worry about what I'm going to do with the baby because he 'might put something in his mouth'. Am I making sense? I LOVE my baby and I DON'T DON'T DON'T want to rush him out of the baby stage but at the same time I don't think I want go down that road for a 4th time. AND THEN......I have these little twinges....sometimes those twinges feel more like a punch in the gut...that say 'YOU WANT ANOTHER BABY'. How can I be 110 percent DONE one minute then feel like I want another one the next?!?!?! We are happy as a family of 5 so why do I feel like this! I want to grow up as a family but here and there are the little things that make me soooo long for another baby. My 9 month old is getting WAY TOO BIG WAY TOO FAST so that may be part of the problem. I really can't see us having another one but then that makes me a little sad. SEE?!?!?! See how I go back and forth?!?!?! Please someone tell me I'm not the only one who feels this way! I guess the best way to put it is that we are finished having babies {unless of course we are surprised} but I am sad about it. Tell me I'm not alone!

I can't believe how big you have gotten!!!!!

9 Months. Are you sure? I'm in denial. In 3 short months my baby boy will be ONE and my sweet little girl will be THREE! No way. It isn't possible. But since everyone keeps reminding me about it I guess I will accept it and put a few things here I don't want to forget.

You are still ALL smiles ALL the time [well most of the time anyway].

You weigh in at a healthy 18 pounds.

You wanted NOTHING to do with baby food AT all so we have moved on to table food. You LOVE LOVE LOVE sweet potatoes and all things FRUIT. I don't have to mess with mashing anything up, you 'gum' it just fine.

You have TWO little teeth now. On the bottom, side by side. You have only bit me a few times while nursing and I think you have pretty much learned your lesson about that.

You still get up at night. There have been a few nights you didn't get up at all but for the most part you get up at least once and on occasion you get up more. I don't mind unless it is EVERY HOUR [which is seldom].

You speed crawl everywhere you go [and go you do].

Once you get to your destination you pull yourself up and cruise around. I have found you standing without holding on to anything several times. It is getting more and more often and for longer periods but you haven't taken any steps yet. I want you to walk but I have to admit...I am sad that it is happening so soon.


I love going into your room in the mornings. You don't cry when you wake up but instead you talk and play until I come get you unless of course I take to long and then you get rather mouthy. Once I get into your room you look up at me with a great big smile that makes me melt.

You have started to show some signs of being bashful especially around women. When they look at and talk to you, you smile a huge smile and bury your face in my shoulder or look down. I'm sure this phase won't last long as your brother and sister know NO strangers.

When Jordan is in the room you watch his every move. You love for Jordan and Alana to play with you and you already don't like it when someone takes a toy from you. I have a feeling I'm in for a few power struggles among the three of you BUT I also thing you three will be inseparable!

You LOVE the swimming pool. You will float around for as long as we stay in the pool. I just have to keep an eye on you because you like to lick the water and sometimes dip your nose in it too. You aren't a fish silly little boy.


I can still say that you have been the easiest baby!

The miracle of LIFE! There is nothing more precious than a sweet baby being born! A dear friend of mine allowed me the opportunity to be present once again when her sweet baby boy was born last night! I have witnessed 3 births not including my own and it NEVER gets old! I am so grateful that I was able to be there! Her sweet babe was born last night just after 9pm and she did it with no meds...for the 6th time. If you ask me she's nuts but I admire that! I can say I did it with no meds for 1 out of THREE. It was the middle child and I didn't CHOOSE that but rather had no choice and would NEVER do it again if given the option. My friend was so strong and she did an awesome job...I was sooo proud! She has witnessed one of my births also and IF [and thats a HUGE if] we have any more children I hope she'll be there...after all she's an expert! If you have children then you KNOW what its like to be in labor and to be honest there are only a very small handful of people that I would EVER allow see me in that manner. To be one of those people for her makes me feel very honored. I am so blessed to have such a wonderful friend!!!! I now have 4 of her 6 children in my home while she is in the hospital and her dear mother in law takes a much needed break...add that to my 3 and we have a houseful but I see it as a privilege to help such an awesome friend in such a special time! HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR JASON CHARLES POOLE AND CONGRATULATIONS TO YOUR MOMMY AND DADDY!!!